Yang hak

Salam

Harini gua mesej dengan sorang dak Medik , ex intec

Perbualan seperti biase, islamik gitu

Bagi memeriahkan suasana , gua hantar gamba selfie gua yang paling hot

Die kata gamba tu standard darurat dah, xleh nak tayang langsung, bahaya

Ahahha

Kemudian dia kata die xde abang, 

Xleh nak recommend,

Gua pon cakap

" xperla , hati i dah berpunya pon" 

Tertutup untuk semua lelaki kecuali abg idaman gua, ( perghhhh) hahaha

Then,dapat jawapan sentap

" semoga diberi pada yang hak"

Perghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Gilerr ah.

Betul jugakkan

Saper boleh gerenti itu jodoh gua

Nanti bazir masa je

Kalu bukan yang hak, 

Ayoyo

Mungkin gua patut melupakan semua ni.

Buat masa kini

Haishhh

Yang tersentap,

Adila

Lapar

Salam

Hari ni , petang gua tertidor dalam bilik, dalm gelap

Bangun2 lapar, ada orang mesej 

Suruh ambik makanan kat bilik dia.

Itulah rezeki harini

Thanks kawan!

Seharian gua terpikir, 

Macam mana xnak masukkan kata2 yang pedih oleh lecturer dalam hati

Time praktikal,

Lecturer kata gigi gua hodoh 

Then dapat B,

Aku ok je

Tapi sampai sekarang ternyinyang kata2 tu

Kuat gila dia cakap,

Satu lab dengar

Apa nak sedih?

Aku memang buat hodoh pon, 

Aku pon tahu hodoh gigi tu

Hahahha

Kenapa lah aku buat hodoh sangat ha?

Rase tak berbakat pulak 

Rase kenape lah aku nak sangat dentistry ni, 

Tapi xkanlah Allah main campak je aku kat sini,

Semuanya dirancang

Haaaaaaaa

Ini semua setan laknatuallah la ni, 

Suke buat aku down, 

Benci kau setan!

Benciiiiiiii!!!!!!!!

Waaaa, nak nangis

Tapi xde air mata nak keluar

Erm, 

I need motivation, 

I need it soo badly!

Ya allahhhhh, 

Bagilah aku kekuatan...

Lemahnya rasa dirini.

Yang merintih,

Adila

Update

Bismillah, 

Asalamualaikum, 

Still in First week of second year, 

Hoo belom ape ape dah penat dengan ilmu baru,

Praktical baru

I ll try to be better,

Insyallah

No more weird fear, 

Kene rapat dengan buku

Distraction pon dah xde, 

Oh selesa!

Tapi rindu pon ade 

Puiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!! Ahahaha

Oklah, bebyeeeeee

Different

bismillah

maaf banyak post,
biler mood menaip datang,
memang selalunyer satu hari je lah,
jadi satu hari ade banyak post


last time, ada sorang ustad ni pesan,
" awak kene keluar dari kebiasaan wanita"

contoh ustad tu bagi,
bila Rasuallah terima wahyu pertama, Nabi SAW mengeletar dan Siti Khatijah pun menyelimutkan Baginda tanpa menanyakan apa-apa
kebiasaan wanita akan terus je tanya kenape-kenape kan

erm, aku selalu berfikir,
adakah aku ni kebiasaan wanita sekarang?
but its hard to be abnormal in a group,
mula lah nanti sunyi dalam keramaian

im just like other girl, just recently,
i dont like necklace before, tapi bila tengok kawan2 layan Pandora and so on,
hati ni pon nak jugak

bukak instagram lagilah,
ramai betul tayang muka,
bertudung labuh atau tidak,
and i dont know kalu itu boleh ke x?
but seriusly come on,
i wish to be like that too

like that?
posing,
ambik gamba cantik,
gamba dengan kawan2,
tunjuk barang mahal ke,
but i will be THE SAME
THE SAME LIKE OTHERS
it is so cliche,
and i dont wanna be same!
i guest ini lah langkah aku untuk keluar dari kebiasaan wanita sekarang.
jeles memang jeles,
i just wanna be like that, but ...hermm.

relationship trends?
dont mention about boyfriend,
couple? nahh..
tunang di awal usia? oww  thats sound good,
aku pon terase nak ikut jugak trend tu tapi apokan dayo


cabaran sungguh nak ikut pesan ustad ni
but ill try.

Keluar taman syurga

bismillah

Asalamualaikum,

jadi, semalam aku wrote a mesej,
saying aku nak keluar usrah,
then SHE said "ok kalau itu yang dila nak"

and now im asking myself
"puas tak? ini yang ko nak kan?"
hahaha

starting classes next week.
second year will be much more harder than first year,
since i have two usrah, i guest quitting one of them will be very handy for me,
i may not be doing the right decision,
but sometimes the wrong decision satisfy your heart better,
but still.....

ive been static for too long,
but i am afraid of being daie,
but thats arrogant pulak,
i have to be one day also,
walaupon cap ayam
heii.. aku dulu dah jadi cap ayam pon,
hahah ape nak risau kan?

sombong mungkin penghalang kot,
no more judge people la lepas ni,
i try, insyallah
ameen

Tuhan kepada diri sendiri

bismillahirrahman nirrahim

Asalamualaikum,
erm heavy heart, ( sebab nak balik)

jadi kesimpulannya,
duk rumah sebulan
aku tidur,
dengar lagu, joget,
tengok benda tak senonoh,
urut mak jap2,
makan,
makan,
berkilo naik,
dasar kau dila!

haritu ada kawan pesan,
sebelum balik,
niat nak berubah,
x berubah pon,
sedihnya

aku ni kadang2 nak buat ape je aku nak,
aku ni dari kecik suka dengar lagu,
hafal semua lagu,
bila dah besar, baru tahu dngar lagu ni x elokla sangat kan,
aku jadi x leh terima,
aku still nak dengar

islamik, islamik jugak,
dengar lagu , dengar lagu la

macam makan pil kurus,
makan pil kurus , makanlah
melantak makan, melantakla

apa yang aku buat ni clash betul la,
aku pon risau,

baca quran , baca
tapi dengar lagu entah hape,
layan cerita yang hape2 pon ade
drama melayu yang xtahu agama pun (pegang nak rak)

deep deep down,
aku tahu ape aku buat ni salah,
nak islam tapi masih mahukan jahilliyah,
macamana tahu ni semua salah?
hati ni x tenang langsung,
sampaikan hati aku ni berdengup2,
sebab dah giler sangat dengar lagu ( ini serius)
yang worstnyer,
aku ni kadang2 hafal alquran,
hati aku macam berlawan baik dgn jahat,
parah lah macam ni

mungkin betul la kot
aku ni cuba jadi tuhan kepada diri aku,
ini kes syirik ni,
menduakan tuhan,
boleh batal aqidah,
mana taknya,
mana aku nak buat, aku buat,
mana yang aku xnak buat , aku x nak buat,
islam x ambil secara keseluruhan,
bodohnyerrr laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah ,
adoi , penatlah

aku kene bertaubatlah,
kalu aku mati esok lusa mcam mane kan, adoi
YA allah,
bantu aku..
ya allahhh.
sapa yang baca ni,
tolong doakan saya yer.
erm

=(

people go, memories stay

bismillah hirrahmannirrahim

Asalamualaikum,
hari apakah ini,
sudah lama tidak menaip

so,
hari ahad lepas( semalam) hantar Maktam,
hari ni ( isnin) hantar abg ke  terminal one balik uum dia,
hari khamis abg ipar gi vietnam,
hari jumaat gua pulak yang akan pergi ke india


"kenapa semua orang kene pergi?"

i guest it is just apart of life,
i will die at the end ( i will go too)
everybody will

even back in hostel
some of my friends
left me, (they move out from hostel )
we cant simply force people to stay in our life
they eventually will go
to where and when are the questions

i once blamed everyone that were leaving me,
angry and sad,
but it feel so wrong,
who am i to stop them,
i guest i was not good enough,
to make them stay

just because they dont stay meaning they dont love us,
they just have better choice,
and we should happy for them.

thats all i guest
=)

Mulakan semula

bismillahhirrahmanniraahim

Asalamualaikum,

hai yooall
how was it goin?
feelin better now,
the wedding was over.
not mine for sure.

couple days ago, i watched a movie called "starting all over again"
pinoy movie ( Philippine)
it was nice.
it was great!
but you know, as a Muslim,
for sure i dont really like the storyline,
but i like the ending.

it was a story about a girl.who worked hard to get a guy. then finally, the guy loves her back. but then as they are in love, the girl started to be afraid of their future. she is a very ambitious girl  but the guy just vice versa. so, she decided to leave the guy and further her study in Barcelona. her mom supported her study. and she made it until Master.

few years later, he came back to Philippine. and she had to renovate her old boyfriend family's house. then, she tried to get the guy back. she became so obsessed. she tried everything to get the guy.
she think that meeting the guy again was a destiny. to bring them closer again. but turned out to be it was just a closure.

then, she stop loving the guy. and she is staring all over again. she had been stucked for too long with the guy. the moment she opens her heart for other guys ,the world become so wide. so wide and every guy seem to be possible to get into her heart.

its remind me of law of attraction somehow. the law states that everything that we are attract to, we will get it! the girl was so stuck with her old boyfriend until she was captivated with her own- making prison.

this sort of thing, could happen to us too.
we are sometimes become blind with something,
that prevent us from seeing the whole wider world that posses much more precious things.
we become deluded
 and why im telling you this thing?

im not gonna lie to you that im just regular-typical girl,
loving someone ,it is just like a part time job ( haha)
i do love someone( or shall i say a few someone? haha)

and i keep thinking of marrying this particular guy,
my life wanting only him to be my partner,
no room for other guys.
and im kindda figured out that im gonna save my heart for the next 5 or 4 years just for this guy.

and here's come the next question,
IT IS WORTH IT?

who knows?
nobody knows.
and there is no guarantee at all that he's gonna be mine.

love but scare,
afraid but dare,
worry but brave,
happy but sad.

watching this movie make me realize that maybe im just like the girl.
im limiting myself,
i really want to move on, or starting all over again, or at least dont put anyone in my heart ,
but what if i wait and it worth it?

loss are everywhere,
together is for sure( insyallah)  but with who is the question,
but now only time would tell
waiting would be my bestfriend now

Ulang tahun ke 21

bismillah

Sempena harijadiku,
yang ke dua puluh satu,
ingin aku hadiahkan buat diri ini,
sebuah puisi untuk bekalan masa tua ku nanti

kehadapan diriku,
sudah tua rupanya kamu,
masih ku ingat lagi saat kecil dulu kita berlari,dan berlari dan berlari
bersama abang dan teman-temanku ,
tak terasa masa pantas berlalu ,
setiap muka yang ku lihat dulu kini semuanya berubah
malah ada yang sudah tiada,
tiada disisi ,
hanya kerana aku pergi,
mengembara hampir ke serata tanah air,
dan mengembaraan ini akan berakhir,
cuma kapan bila terhenti.

kehadapan diriku,
aku tahu ada kebencian dalam hidupmu,
kebencian yang dibawa oleh cemburu,
aku mahu kamu belajar memaafkan sesuatu,
kenapa harus berdendam semua,
malah kamu pun diampunkan-Nya,
mengapa membawa beban derita?


kehadapan diriku,
takut hanya merugikan waktu,
takut memusnahkan peluang,
takut tidak terlihat,
buangkan saja perasaan hina itu


kehadapan diriku,
teruskan berjuang demi agama,
menaikkan bangsa,
putus asa tiada didada,
ayuhhh siap siaga!

jangan lupa musuh mu,
syaitan, nafsu, malah dirimu terkadang halangan nyata


aku maafkan diriku,
aku maafkan segala manusia,
aku akan terus melangkah,
bismillah

2 Sept 2014